This summer has been a strange one so far – disappointments and unexpected turns have been jumping over celebrations and good moments. Bad news and joyous vibes have been competing for the Olympic title of my life... Due to an unexpected turn of events, our plans for traveling to Europe are being put on hold for an undefined period of time. The unknown is what has been occupying these summer months... and frankly, it has all been mind-numbing. I had felt the discomfort of the unknown many times before, but I thought I had worked really hard to eliminate it and to stay open to uncertainty. Obviously, not hard enough. Somehow, it has hung over me and darkened my thoughts. My mental space has been stocked with worries, yet hopes and prayers for the universe to guide me find wisdom and insights. I've known deep down within me that everything will resolve the way it is supposed to, but the wait! The wait is what has been draining my energy, my focus and my otherwise optimistic, patient self. I wanted for a time to hurry and to go fast and yet when I celebrated my precious son's 18th birthday, I wished for time to stop and wait and go slow...
I was brimming with all that confusion and fragility when in one moment, it just clicked. A great hardship is never desirable, but that doesn't mean that we can't make use of it; it can provide an extraordinary lesson capable of making us aware of the shallowness of our daily concerns, of the overwhelming pressure of the crazy world we are living in, and above all, of what truly matters in our human progression towards individual inner freedom. At this moment, I promised myself to manage my attention, not my time. To trust the path, to learn from it and to put my faith in action as I tune into what makes me happy, what completely absorbs me and puts me back in my creative center – photography and writing.
Next, I was browsed in a favorite bookshop of mine, the place of comfort and escape in need of a lift. A little orange book quietly caught my attention. I always trust my instincts when it comes to picking books. As I began to flip through the pages, I read:

  "Welcome
   You have now become an official member of the Wander Society. 
...Society wants us to live a planned existence, following paths that have been traveled by others. Tried and true. The known, the expected, the controlled, the safe.
   The path of the wanderer is not this!
  The path of the wanderer is an experiment with the unknown. To be idle, to play, to daydream. 
...Wandering is not about a specific place or destination, getting from one place to another, or movement as a means to an end.
   Instead, it's about letting the soul and mind roam.
...The wanderer can observe, be present, pay attention, and be open to the unknown – all while remaining still. Entering into a wandering mindset involves partaking in the wandering rituals, turning off technology, breathing deeply, using the senses, tuning in.
...Life is an experiment. To wander is to seek the unexpected.
   Does the act of doing something without purpose challenge you a little?
   Good."

A wave of excitement went through my body. A current of happiness rushed from my heart. I knew the universe conspired to help me go through the suffering of my mind and be myself again. All I needed to do was to be aware that this precious life will not last forever and that it is essential to make the best possible use of it. I needed one more time to sincerely examine what counts in life for me and simplify my activities, my inner voice and my expectations. 
I read the book in a day and found myself on my daily walk (wandering) with Charlie, this time unplanned, letting him lead me.
Re-charged with curiosity. Exhaling deeply. With ready eyes. Grateful to feel alive.
I made an amazing discovery that day – the streets were blanketed with blooming linden trees and the world was smelling like one. I came home with arms full of branches. I picked the flowers and made myself a tea. I baked a lemon cake glazed with the tea. The aroma filled the air around me. With every sip of the soothing infusion, I felt the presence of my grandma serving me the tea every time I had a fever as a child. I remember her telling me about the magical effect this flower has on healing our bodies. In almost every major hospital in Europe, there were long lines leading to the entrance doors, planted to supply the hospital with linen flowers for infusion that was given to sick patients and soldiers waiting for medical care. I realized, once again, that everything in life is a source of information, that everything in the natural world can be healing, once you stop taking it for granted and let it reveal its magic to you. The only honest way for me to survive this strange summer is to do what my soul thrives on, to participate with my mind in the direct experience of everyday life and to look at the ordinary in a whole new light. I have everything I need "to create a bond with the unknown wilderness I am about to enter into even though it might scare me a little."
I have become a wanderer.
I have arrived.

    The Wanderers are everywhere.




Thank you, dear friends, for reading. I hope you are having a nice and simple summer. My heart is heavy with the world right now, but despite the unbearable pain, I refuse to be afraid. I still believe in the goodness of humanity and that people are fundamentally loving and good.